10 Tips On How To Raise Preteen Boys
I thank God for my son, but a preteen boy is nothing compared to a preteen girl. Raising a preteen son is another level for me, but I’ve learned to embrace the differences. Their hormones are changing, they have a lot of opinions and are trying to figure out life as they’re transitioning to another level of maturity. Parenting can be tough, but the rewards are great in the end.
Here are a few tips I’ve discovered to help you on your journey with your preteen son.
1. Give him the word of God daily
If you establish a habit of reading God’s word with your son at an early age, it will come easy when he becomes a preteen. Naturally, they are changing and their hormones are racing, but nothing can replace daily reading together. It’s always good for your son to have a devotional and a bible which he can refer to throughout the week. We love this one.
2. Listen without criticizing
As your son grows up, he will begin to form his own opinion and ideas. As moms, it is our job to let him speak his mind and listen without criticizing. You may not totally agree with his ideas, but letting him voice them are golden to him. It lets him know you’re listening.
3. Take interest in his hobbies
Learn to take interest in his hobbies and activities. My son loves to draw. He will draw all day if I permitted him. However, I can doodle, and that’s about it. Drawing is just not something I’m good at. My son can go through a double pack of sketchbooks in no time. Occasionally, I will sit down and let him instruct me on the process. I’ve found a sketchbook and a drawing guidebook is a great combination.
I think my son does a pretty good job on his drawings. Here’s a recent finished product.
4. Break the routine and do something out of the ordinary
Believe it or not, your preteen can still be a little silly. They’re between the age of still being a kid, but also wanting to mature. So, if your son wants to do something totally out of the ordinary, join him. My son made a fort and asked me to join him. I thought to myself, “Hmm, this might be fun.” As it turned out, he just wanted to be a kid and act silly with the flashlight at that particular moment.
5. Let him have his space
As your son grows up, he will begin to want his own space and independence. My son wants to hang out more with his friends. That’s a good thing because it gives him an outlet to hang out with his peers. I’ve learned it’s okay to be near, but also have my distance.
6. Choose your battles
Choose what you will fight about. I’ll never forget going out to dinner with friends and my son wanted to wear an old t-shirt. He had his opinion about his favorite shirt and was adamant about wearing it. Instead of being late and having a disagreement, I let him win the battle. We enjoyed dinner and I don’t think anyone recognized the fact the shirt was old and didn’t match his outfit.
7. Get dad involved when he’s not listening
If you’re having a hard time getting your son to listen, it may be time to get dad involved in the conversation. There are times when dad needs to step in as the authority figure. The voice and stamina of a father are unlike a mother’s. Many times, I only have to mention that dad wouldn’t be pleased with his behavior and it takes care of itself.
8. Let him make mistakes
At times, it’s hard for us to let our children fail. Failing is a part of growing up. Let him make mistakes and be there ready to discuss his failures with a listening ear and possible offer solution. I recently read an article at www.wehavekids.com which nicely written on letting your preteens make mistakes.
9. Let him take the lead
You will begin to see some leadership skills develop as you let your son take the lead on activities and ideas. You may not totally agree with his decision and may require some adjustments, but let him lead an activity or conversation. Foster it and let him thrive.
10. Embrace the change
Life is all about changes. Your preteen son will change a lot over the next few years. Embrace the changes as they occur because it won’t be long before he’s an adult.
I hope these ideas were helpful. If you have a preteen son, I would love to hear some of your parenting advice in this area.
Until next time, continue to add value to your family.